Love.

We were having an amazing church service this morning. Worship was so raw, the Spirit was so heavy (in a good, overwhelming way). I was so captivated by the Love of God, and as I was resting in his peace, Nikolai starts pulling on my pants leg. I could here his "Mom, Mom, Mommy...." I looked down at him and with his gorgeous eyes wide he said, "Can you just hold me for a while?" At first I was a little annoyed, I was really longing for this time with My Lord. I  picked him up though and went back into that sacred place holding him. He gently layed his head down on my shoulder, and whispered, "Thank You Mom! I just want to be close to you."

My little guy had no idea what revelation he had brought to me by that brief statement. The longing he had to be close to me and to be held, is the same longing I have to be close to God.  My eyes welled with tears at the realization that this desire that I have to be with God is not one sided. The same God who told the ocean where to stop, who placed the stars in the sky, and who died so I could live is beckoning me. He is saying to me, "Maranda, stop. Just let me hold you. Quit squirming. Stop whining. Don't worry. Stop thinking. Just lay your head down and breathe." The Love of a Father.